Carmen update: Carmen is hanging in there. Will she get through this sickness? We don’t know. She is up and down, fever and respiratory distress one day and then no fever and calm the next. Right now, she is doing OK. She is still on 3 liters of oxygen but she is staying 90% and above. She had another fever last night. She has been peacefully resting and hasn’t needed morphine. Thank you for your continued prayers!
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Every once in a while, we cross paths with a truly amazing person. Carmen and Lauren had a babysitter a few years ago who is just that…amazing. She sent us this letter to Carmen last month. Thank you Tina.
April 12, 2009
Dear Carmen,
We will never get to have a conversation on earth, but I hope you’ll be able to read this letter in heaven. Carmen, I want you to know what a difference you’ve made here. You came to us three years ago and stole our hearts. That was before the Tay Sachs stole you. We had only a few months of pure joy with you before finding out that your stay on this earth would be so short. You’ve made the most of it, though.
I know that you can’t talk or walk or smile. You can’t thank your Mommy for everything she does or hug your Daddy goodnight. You can’t play with Lauren or make Hope giggle. But Carmen, you have not wasted your life. You see, Carmen, you’ve changed us. There is not a single one of us who has not learned something from you. You have pushed us towards our heavenly Father, whether that means holding onto Him in pain or asking angrily, “Why?” Because of you, we have prayed more and believed more. We have fought harder to hold onto our faith when it seemed like the last shreds of belief were slipping through our fingers. We have clung to God when we didn’t understand, or rather, He has clung to us. He never lets go.
I live on a different continent now, so I don’t know if I will ever see you again here on earth. Carmen, I consider it one of the greatest privileges of my life to have known you. I was one of the few who got to give you a bottle, feed you your favorite vegetable and put you down for a nap. For a long time, I couldn’t believe that the Tay Sachs was real. I still don’t understand why God would take you away from us.
Do you know what our one hope is, Carmen? Both your family and I, as well as many other people who love you, know that this life is not the end. We know that someday soon, you will be free. In reality, it is now that we have lost you, while this disease has taken away the Carmen we knew. But when you see Jesus, then you will be Carmen like we never could have dreamed. You will be able to talk and walk and dance and laugh and worship your Creator without your broken body holding you back. Carmen, that’s what keeps us going. It’s knowing that this is not the end and that someday we will make new memories together when all of us are whole and healed and free.
I always believed that God could heal you on this earth, but I don’t know if He will choose instead to heal you by calling you home to Himself. All I know is that this story, this sickness, does not end in death. Only time will tell how much life will be given to so many people because of one little girl named Carmen.
Carmen, I will miss you, but I will never forget you. You have impacted hundreds of people simply by being. Thank you for your life. Thank you for coming to us. Thank you for teaching us what is really important in life. I am so grateful to have known you.
I love you, Carmen.
With all my heart,
Tina
Thanking God for someone named, Tina, who has spoken for all of us. What a family reunion we will one day have in heaven…. Hallelujah!
Thanks.
What a lovely letter. Carmen looks so beautiful and peaceful. Praying for you all.
Beautiful!
Simply beautiful and perfectly stated
What an amazing letter and an even more amazing little girl – praying for peace and comfort for Carmen.
Tina, You said beautifully what we all think, thank you. Carmen, I too love you and am thankful to know you, can’t wait to meet you. Love, Joe
Amen and praying for peace, comfort and grace for your family.
Thank you Lana for sharing this beautiful letter with all of us. Thank you Tina for sharing your heart and expressing what we feel. Thank you Carmen for being our precious little girl.
Thank you Father for bringing us all together to gaze upon Your beauty through Carmen’s life.
Ditto
God gives us so many gifts through other people- Tina sounds like a beautiful person and I thank you for sharing her letter to Carmen with all of us! Carmen has truly blessed this world with her presence. Keeping all of you in my prayers!
That was so touching. Her letter made me cry. That could have been written for my son Cameron and was good for me to read during our journey.
Thank you. That’s all I can say right now.
what a perfect piece of writing…as my faith grows in the Lord, I see the power in Him…..Thank you…
Thanks and God bless!