Comments (5)

By Dave ©, October 31, 2009 1:14 pm

Things I’m learning (mostly about myself) in my new role as Mr. Mom:

• I’m not nearly as proficient at blogging as Lana.
• I don’t take nearly as many pictures as Lana. Sorry for the lack of visual appeal on the blog lately.
• I actually can cook oatmeal without burning it, which makes Lauren quite happy.
• Working from home is great! I am far more efficient and productive than when I am in the office. However, I do miss the social aspect of working in the physical presence of others. I can see why it is important for stay-at-home moms to “get out of the house.”
• God has granted me great favor at work and I am incredibly thankful for it. I have a great boss and I am part of a great team.
• Serving my wife can be really, really exhausting…but it’s also incredibly rewarding!
• I have enough energy to serve others during times of crisis. That means I have enough energy to serve others when things are fine too. My excuse that “I’ve had a long day” is gone!
• I am very anal about keeping the kitchen clean. The rest of the house can be a wreck but, for some reason, I like the dirty dishes to be in the dishwasher, the sink to be clean and the counters to be clear of clutter. I think I am driving my dad crazy!
• I am a much better dad/mom when things are tough, perhaps because I am more focused on being a parent than on doing other things I do normally (like taking pictures, making videos and having “me” time).
• Prayer really does work. I knew this before but love having renewed confirmation.
• I am grateful for people who see a need and simply do something to meet it.
• I have the best wife in the world!

Comments (3)

By Lana, October 29, 2009 3:20 pm

A while ago one of you sent us a link to the short video, 99 Balloons. This video tells the story of Eliot Mooney. Two months before Eliot was born, he was diagnosed with Trisomy 18, a genetic disorder with a very low survival rate. Eliot’s parents, Matt and Ginny, prayed for a miracle.

Eliot was born July 20, 2006, the same day Carmen was born.

Recently I was telling a friend about 99 Balloons. I decided to look up Matt and Ginny’s blog and see what they are up to. As I read through their recent posts, I was happy to read that Matt and Ginny have a little girl now and that Ginny is pregnant again. But, imagine my surprise when I read that Ginny is due February 7, 2010, the same day I am due!

Ginny has been on strict bed rest for 7 weeks due to placenta previa. As I lay here from my own strict bed rest side-lying couch position, I will be praying for God to give Matt and Ginny strength and peace. Oh, and happy birthday (a little late) to Ginny!

Here’s the 99 Balloons video. Make sure you have a tissue.

***

Carmen update: Carmen is doing MUCH better! She is still congested and needs extra suctioning but no fever and her breathing is relaxed. A new nurse started today, working the 8am til noon shift. It was so helpful to have a few day hours covered!

Hope and Me: Yesterday’s appointments with the perinatologist and my obstetrician went very well. Nothing has changed, still effaced and dilated, so I am staying home for now on continued strict bed rest. While at the doctor’s, I got the swine flu shot. Initially, I wasn’t so sure I wanted this shot but ultimately decided that we don’t need swine flu going around this house! Hope decided to wave her hands around and open and close her mouth during the ultrasound. So sweet!

Thanks to Unjoo for the bulgogi! In case you aren’t familiar with bulgogi, it is delicious Korean BBQ. We had a wonderful dinner and Unjoo brought more for the freezer. Thanks for the fun gifts for Lauren. Those fake princess fingernails were a BIG hit! Unjoo, we will be praying on Monday as you welcome your new baby girl into the world. Thanks to my MOPS group for bringing over magazines, books, snacks, etc. I miss you guys! Thanks to the person who wants to remain anonymous for whipping our house into shape. I am happy that tomorrow the house cleaner will be able to get to the parts that need cleaning! You are very kind for trying to make me think it wasn’t so bad.

Comments (15)

By Lana, October 27, 2009 2:03 pm

Everyone needs a friend when life hurts. A friend who can handle crises and somehow knows what to say and what not to say. A friend to be real with who ignores the things we say that we don’t mean. A friend we can fall apart in front of and it’s OK.

Almost 10 years ago, Dave and I went through a rough spot with miscarriages and Dave working in England for a year. During that time I had a couple of really good friends. One in particular, Christina, picked me up and carried me through that time. I am 100% sure that God had us buy a house right across the street from Christina and her husband because He knew I would need my friend.

Today, I have a few friends who are once again carrying me through this time of bed rest and terminal illness. Sometimes I just need to yell, “I can’t do this anymore!” I just hope my friends aren’t overwhelmed by all the falling apart going on around here lately!

Yesterday was one of those days. Dave was in Chicago on business. Poor Carmen was so congested and couldn’t stop coughing. She kept choking and having coughing spasms. I suctioned and suctioned but nothing was helping. Monica the Magnificent came over and held Carmen for hours, patting her back. All that patting helped because Carmen’s breathing eased. Just when I breathed a sigh of relief, things went awry again. The 7pm night nurse didn’t show up. I called the agency and there had been a mix-up in the schedule. They immediately started working on finding someone to cover the shift. Time ticked by and at 10pm poor Carmen had not received any of her 7pm medications, treatments, food, etc. NY Grandpa was getting Lauren to bed. I was in tears. At that point, some elaborate, spiritual prayer was out of the question so I just prayed, “God, HELP, HELP, HELP, HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!” Nurse Ruthann arrived a little after 10pm and announced that she could stay until 10am, giving us some much needed rest.

Not only do I have a friends who are there when life is hard, I also have the ultimate friend, God. He can handle crises and doesn’t seem to be disturbed by anything I say. I can fall apart in front of Him and it’s OK.

P.S. In moments of frustration, it is not a good idea to yell out a bad word, even if you spell it instead of saying it. The almost 6 year old sounded it out and then had great fun saying it over and over!

***

My friend Cristie said she doesn’t need a blog-style thank you but she is getting one anyway! Thanks for listening to my rantings and for the delicious soup!!! Thanks to Monica who loves Carmen so much. Thanks to NY Grandpa for being ready, with bags packed, to help us. Thanks to Helen and Athos for the wonderful dinner on Sunday night. We enjoyed every bite! And coming from you guys, well, it was extra special.

Comments (4)

By Lana, October 25, 2009 6:00 pm

I am feeling far more stressed than thankful right now. But, I know that writing down what I am thankful for often changes how I feel so here is my thankful list.

• Carmen’s breathing sounds good right now. Yesterday she had 102 fever and lots of congestion. NY Grandma suctioned out a huge amount of thick mucus and Carmen went from sounding like a coffee percolator to clear. She is still congested and coughing but a little bit better.
• Lauren’s love of life. She makes me laugh every single day.
• Dave, my super strong husband (who I drive nuts on a regular basis).
• I am 25 weeks pregnant today.
• Cool fall weather. I can look out the window and see the orange, yellow, green and brown leaves.
• The 21st century. I am thankful for medication to stop labor and keep terminally ill children comfortable.
• That I can go on bed rest and that I am not in a situation where that would be impossible. Hard, yes. Impossible, no.
• The Biggest Loser. I look forward to that show every week!
• Leftover London broil, baby potatoes, corn, barbecue lima beans, and creamed spinach compliments of the NY Grandparents.
• My new phone nurse, Rhonda, who is monitoring my contractions and available for any questions. I can’t believe I have my own nurse!
• The extra 4 hours of nursing care for Carmen each day that will start this week.
• The Good Mobile that takes Lauren to Awana and brings her home.
• Rashmi. Check out her recent post. Love it. Thanks, Rashmi.
• The book of Matthew. One chapter left to read.
• Friends.
• Family.
• Great doctors.

Comments (5)

By Lana, October 24, 2009 1:02 pm

I used to love roller coasters. Not any more. I prefer stable and boring and my feet on the ground. I don’t think that even remotely describes our life though!

I got home from the hospital last night. The doctor checked again before I left and I am 1cm dilated and 60% effaced. Two different ultrasounds showed two totally different numbers this past week but the doctor said she feels much more confident in her own exam. I am on super strict bed rest. The next 4 weeks are going to be the most critical for Baby Hope. We are praying that she will keep cooking for many more weeks.

Next week I will start seeing a perinatologist (high risk doctor). I have a Terbutaline pump in my tummy and a home contraction monitor. Unfortunately, the Terbutaline side effects came back in full force yesterday when I changed from pills to the subcutaneous pump. I didn’t sleep at all last night. Hopefully the side effects will diminish over the next few days.

I have to stick myself with a needle every 3-5 days to change the pump site. Ugh! I had to insert the pump before I left the hospital and it took me a long time before I could stick myself. That sort of amused me as I have done all sorts of things for Carmen but trying to jab myself in the stomach with a needle just about did me in!

As the nurse was explaining the pump to me, I had to smile because I know what a Luer Lock tip syringe is and believe me, medical machines don’t phase us anymore! Carmen has certainly taught us things we never imagined needing to know.

Carmen is super congested and struggling with low oxygen levels. Dave is doing a great job of taking care of her. I feel so helpless though. We have taken care of Carmen for over two years and now I can do nothing for her. Please pray that Carmen will be comfortable and will hang in there for many more months. I don’t know how I could handle losing her right now.

***

Dave’s coworker brought over home-made Indian food. Thank you Shalini! That made Dave’s day! Thank you to Cristina for the yellow flowers (please tell Elise she did a great job of picking them out), Wes and Karen and kids for the three roses for Lauren, Carmen and Hope, and my in-laws for the bouquet. Huge thanks to my in-laws who are here helping out with anything that needs to be done. I don’t know all that has gone on around here lately so thanks to anyone I missed!